Tuesday, February 23, 2010

20 Things Worth Knowing About Beer

From The Oatmeal
(I have posted and reposted this a couple times but can't get the images to line up perfectly - to see this as it is meant to be seen, you can visit the website The Oatmeal where it originally appeared...)



Just when you thought this was totally random, you saw the ad for the "Cozy" that I won in our Dirty South Dirty Santa...it always comes back to the Dirty South Beer Club...

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Tickle my Hotmouth: February Beer Club

Tickle my Hotmouth: February Beer Club

We assemble en masse chez Melrose Place, Decatur. We await Vargo (and sidekick Lauren), Lain & Amelia, and Christa but we choose not to wait…with the goods ahead! Because, after all, it’s February.

And February means one things: PAIRINGS.

Pairings is actually a repeat for this DSBC, but we felt since it was probably our favorite event last year (save the Mountain beers at the Mountain house…nothing tops that!), we should repeat.

So repeat we did.

Here’s how it works: You bring a pairing of beer with whatever it pairs best with. Last year, for instance, there was a classic and award winning funky blue cheese with a St Peters English Porter. Or a pretzel with a German beer. There was an epic chocolate stout and Brooklyn Black Chocolate—an epic failure, that is.

Soft cow’s cheese, radish, micro greens crostini.

• Damn, dude, that is so good!
• Spice of the beer and the creaminess of the cheese. It’s very French to go with the Belgian.
• Damn, I’m in love with that beer! Yeasty and tasty divine-ness!
• Double it all, mouths off Rupesh! Triple that!
• That’s gonna be hard to beat, says the scribe, in my mouth at least!
• My new favorite beer! Shouts the scribe, again.

Now we turn to a story about Improv Everywhere…(insert link to Best Buy Improv Everywhere video) in an attempt to label…wait, I shouldn’t admit to our upcoming prank.

And we move on…to Vichtenaar, a red Flemish ale. Paired with scotch-infused chocolate covered bacon. OH MY!

• That’s a crazy combo!
• I get raspberry and cola, Brennan says, not too “funky.” I note a total absense of horse blanket.
• The acid in the Flemish cuts through the fatty bacon, explains Sam (who treated us to this)
• This is all I want to eat now!
• Can we have a chocolate covered bacon night?
• The sour in the beer complements the sweet.
• Sweet finish, Ajay chimes in, not too much.
• OH MY GOD.

Amelia shares that Lain once said “chocolate covered bacon is gross. I will never eat that.” Time will tell if that is true!

Third pairing: Ommegang Abbey Ale with sweet and spicy pecans.

• Toasty!
• I like that!
• The flavor profile is similar to the bacon fatty. The Ommegang is sharp and jumpy.
• The nuts become the top notes of flavor. And you get a sharper bass note that you don’t normally get to enjoy on its own.
• You get a nice thingy, says Ajay, quite the technical term
• It makes the beer taste fuller
• I like it!
• Bitter finish…may not be salvageable with these amazing nuts.
• Delicious homemade pralines!
• Tickle my hopmouth! Says the King of Beers Club.

We discuss how Rupesh likes Budweiser. And whether Guinness is vegan! It is not. (but please feel free to prove us wrong!) Then we discuss why you would ever want to drink Guinness anyway. The word Guinness is starting to look really weird to me. Gweeeeee-ness.

Our fourth pairing identified us all through Katy return address stickers. Stuck on our persons, we all felt united in a singular personhood. And our beer? Thatcher’s Katy Cider!

But the presentation didn’t stop there, oh no. It’s was time to get multimedia on our asses. Katy movie time! SERVED WITH GUMMI EGGS (over easy I MEAN SUNNY SIDE UP).

• The cider is disgusting – Katy, re: herself
• Smack smack smack
• This tastes like cheese
• This kinda tastes like meat in a weird way
• The eggs are probably gross, but not as bad as the beer
• Cloying sweet, salt
• How can we discuss the funk that is this cider?
• I kinda like it in a real weird way
• It’s just really, really sweet
• It tastes like something that it’s not
• Tastes like it could be a hooch – a fruit hooch at home
• Skunked? Nah, it might just taste that way.
• Where’s the discharge?

The next pairing came from the brain of Chad Bonner. It’s performance themed. We aren’t allowed to drink once served. The beer: Raison d’Atrearewoivawerfmaw by Dogfish Head.

Then, Chad unfurled a sheet of paper. We raised our glasses to Chad, hesitantly. Chad read aloud a poem “suited to the beer.”

• My favorite Dogish. Better than 90? Oh, I really liked 120.
• All of Dogfish’s heavy stuff.. ohhhhh, that’s the best.
• Dogish Head has recently quadrupled their production (oh wow!)
• It’s on Netflix, apparently. Ariel didn’t watch it because she was wirting her dissertation.
• Chad’s poem, by W.B. Yeats, was about liars, and sitting back and letting everyone else vote. It was from “The Old Stone Cross.” Chad chickened out on the love poem.
• Discussion of the Dogfish Head article in either the New York Times or the New Yorker.
• Another article in the New York Times discusses the Vietnamese, who have some pretty crazy stuff.
• Ariel’s cousin Tacos lives in Dubai. He loves it there.
• Katy likened Dubai to Mall of America. Ha! I doubt there is an American Girl Store in Dubai, thankyouverymuch.
• Discussion of women’s rights in Dubai and blah blah blah.
• Brennan talks about Dubai. It’s captivating so far. Still good. Talking about ex-pats in credit card debt who get stuck there. They won’t let the wives leave, who are rich but homeless. Where is the justice? Where is the furor? Brennan: like whoa, crazy. The rest of us concur.
• Ariel suggested that Brennan and Catherine name their baby Zamboni.
• Katy is going to Jakarta for a week. Sounds bonkers. Delta miles: booya!
• Winnie stepped on my foot.
• Lain is “rolling with it.” It being the computer.
• Ariel is embarrassed to blog because Chad shamed her once.
• There are a lot of candy eggs left. Ajay is saving his for later in his mouth.
• Talk of “licking before sticking.” Will explore later.
• Discussion of Lain and Amelia’s life. It is the most interesting thing that anyone has ever heard.
• Ben put the gummy eggs in his eyes, confusing and delighting everyone but Winnie, who didn’t care.
• Lain went on and on about his work. Eyes glazed over except Winnie’s. She was entranced.
• Sam asked me about my progress. I’m typing pretty good. 80 wpm (adjusted).

Christa’s offering: goat cheese and brandy honey. Bieken ale. It’s belgian. Blond honey, like the ladies called me in junior high. Christa spoke highly of Divine’s, her local beer store. The proprieter of the store stated that this is his favorite beer.
• Amelia was reading over my shoulder and I lost a lot of discussion.
• More beer stores in DC. YAWN! Some of us have never left Decatur, okay?
• Honey is phenomenal. Brennan’s mom brought it from a monestary in VA.
• The goat cheese is from Publix, and is not just whatever!
• The beer is perhaps too subtle for the honey.
• Beer is awesome. Great. I’d guzzle it in the middle of the summer. I’d drink the hell out of it right now.
• Discussion of the fucking weather. Amen. Unreasonable. Undying. Don’t want to talk about it.
• Talk of the South’s inability to deal with snow. Taco Mac is swimming in sand. Folks are still trapped in there. It snowed, like two weeks ago.
• Sam mentioned this crazy CD where the dogs and the babies listen to the same music. Nobody knows why.
• Reminiscing about the chocolate covered bacon, and rightfully so.
• Sent an email. Awesome.

Amelia and Lane’s pairing
Collaboration of Stone and Cambridge Brewdog, black pilsner
Highland Tap black bread
Whoa, that is a rye bread!
I love this pairing
This beer is phenomenal alone!
Nicely done!

It was sort of like, I read a little bit about the beer and it seemed like it might make sense,
You think of a pilsner you think of a light beer, not like this
The dark side of pilsners
The bitter citrus peel goes well with the bitterness of the beer
Parallel tasting – “Pair-a-llel tasting?”
Two finishes to the beer – first pilsner finish, then a stout finish
On the bottle “We hope this beer will be like a punch in the face”
Least predictable pairing, dark horse entry, random sports metaphor here
Chad’s luge ride in my mouth
We finally found a pilsner we like!

Katy and Ben’s pairing II
Independent craft brewery Trogue’s JavaHead
Ben’s famous salted cowboy cookies

The first thing I noticed was the mouthfeel – it’s velvety!
I love the way the beer smells
Chocolate and coffee stout can never go wrong
Fizzy slickness
Thin, no finish
Feels like a slip n slide on my mouth, I need to [put board shorts on my tongue
The cookie brings out the nuttiness of the beer, it mellows out the beer
Acidic beer
Which onsies are we making for the Breed[er]’s baby
Great head on the beer

Discussion of nude men and superbowl beer politics. In fact, I don’t even remember the game being on.
Girls in wet t-shirts. Guy gets hit in the balls. Beer, oh wait never mind.
Wouldn’t order the beer on its own, but would use it as the “milk” over cowboy cookies “Cookie Crisp cereal” style

Brennan walks in with challah and Nutella
Katy tries to capture it on her camera phone but goes to sit in Ben’s lap instead.
Hoppin Frog, barrel-aged Boris oatmeal imperial stout
Bodacious Russian blah blah
It’s from Akron?
You can’t get it here but they sell it in NC, just happened to be in Durham.
Brennan threatened the store owner with physical violence and promised to exchange his firstborn for the stout – oh, sorry.

There’s Nutella in it, but put it on it.
Brennan explains how to braid your hair. He has practiced on Catherine.

Talk of a beer club progressive

Vanilla, bourbon strong,
Pairing brings out boozy
Boozy but amazing
Bread is good
Challah back girl
Beer is boozy but bread balances it out
I tries the beer and it was like alcohol and then the bread and it was like good
Response: nice story
Decadent dessert
Talk of a gefilte fish beer

YUM!!!!!

So in third place is THE FLEMISH SOUR AND BACON!!!!!!!!!!

In second place is….THE NUTELLA STUFFED CHALLAH AND STOUT!!!!!!!

AND IN FIRST PLACE IS AJAY!!!!!!!!!!! With the crostini and Bruery Mischief Ale.

Congrats to all participants. Nicely done!!!

Sunday, February 7, 2010

How to Explain It to My Parents -- Beer as Art



Artist and brewer Arno Coenen has brewed his own beer that "everyone will like" and created a branding campaign surrounding it. The trickiest part -- how do you explain to your dad that your beer is art?

(h/t Stewart Haddock)

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Big Beer just got Bigger


Maybe you already know Avery's slogan, "small brewery, big beers" but they're walking the walk by producing beers like the Mephistopheles' Stout. This Imperial comes in at over 16% ABV (Denver Post, 15.1% at Avery Website). It is a part of the Demons of Ale Series.

Not surprisingly it is among the highest ABVs in beer; in the top 25 (according to beertutor.com). This raises the question of how high they should go and if, at some point, it stops being beer for most people. I'm not even sure how you drink something like that. Naming the beer after one of the seven princes of hell may not be the best way to win over those more conservative beer drinkers. The brewer's description for the second highest ABV beer - the wonderfully named Tactical Nuclear Penguin -states "This is an extremely strong beer, it should be enjoyed in small servings and with an air of aristocratic nonchalance."

Aging Beer with Style


We should check this guy out - he's got a blog called the "Brew Basement" about cellaring beer, full of helpful tips and interesting tasting notes. We need to put our Stout down for a while, so read up.

Are You Ready For Some Beer Commercials?

Oh, yes, ladies and gents, it's almost time for that magical night of football that gets in the way of beer ads: yes, the Super Bowl. From the halcyon days of the "Bud Bowl" to the amazing body of Will Ferrell, the Super Bowl has brought us, year in and year out, mildly amusing 30-second spots hawking tasteless fermented corn-water. What will it be this year? I can't wait.

And catch this: not only the worst-written article ever (seriously, your standards have fallen, Chicago Tribune), but the headline sums up the poor content, to match: "Purdue Professor Says Alcohol Ads Are Confusing." A professor (yes, someone who supposedly wrote a dissertation, etc.) says that beer ads are weird, because they always tell you to drink responsibly but they are trying to sell beer, so if you got drunk they would be richer. See the problem? Geez, Chicago Tribune, you don't need to teach at Purdue to know that beer ads are full of contradictions, the least of which is their "drink responsibly" message. How about the "guy who drinks lots of beer all the time gets the hot model to go out with him" motif for a more confusing one?

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Hmm, That Gets Me Thinking...

...but the end of the story makes me think twice about the ruse. The kid's going to have to get his beer some other way.

Green Beer: Two Ways

St. Patty's and the Environment meet in Goose Island's Green Beer.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Drink Generously -- Today Only!


For today (Monday, February 1st) only, various Decatur businesses will be donating a portion of their proceeds to the American Red Cross for earthquake relief in Haiti. You can see the full list of participants here.

Included are several of my favorite places to enjoy a beer:
Even more heartening for fans of beer (and Decatur)? All of the proceeds raised today will be matched by the Decatur Beer Festival. Impressive, no?

I hope everyone will take this opportunity not only to support the American Red Cross, but to encourage the generosity and kindness of our local businesses. Cheers!